A Kind of Girl

I am the kind of girl who wouldn’t know what to say when a guy asked me out. I wouldn’t know what to do when a guy hold my hand. I will never have an inkling idea if you are interested on me or not.

But…

Look at me straight in the eyes and I will be melting like ice under the scorching heat of the sun. Smile at me for a moment and you will take my breath away. Offer me your shoulder and I will give you my heart. Give me your time and I will be yours for a lifetime.

For I love to spend my whole time daydreaming and weaving my love story in my mind. But when the real thing actually happens, I will be starstruck and will be in deep awe.

I will hardly believe that a girl like me is beautiful enough to be loved.

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Vision of Love

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Falling in love is like getting hit by a large truck and yet not being mortally wounded. Just sick to your stomach, high one moment, low the next. Starving hungry yet unable to eat.

Hot, cold, full of enthusiasm, with momentarily depressions that wipe you out.
It is also not being able to remove the smile from your face.

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Loving life with a mad, passionate intensity and feeling ten years younger.

Love does not appear with any warning signs. You fall into it as if pushed from a high diving board. No time to think about what’s happening. It is unevitable, an event you can’t control.

A crazy, heart-stopping, roller coaster ride that just has to take its course.

An Unspoken Words Left Unheard

Tick. Tock.

The second hand continue to keep ticking. It’s already 4am and my mind is in complete turmoil. I have never felt so troubled before not until this moment. The very moment that I have heard something about you again. Was it five, four, or six weeks since I last heard of you? I can’t even remember when but it seems like forever.

We have been constantly sending e-mails to each other like what Christian T. Grey and Anatasia R. Steele do with those sort of insanely-cute-and-crappy-sometimes-dotdot/smiley subject. Telling most, if not all of the events that happened to our lives. Sharing each others opinions, plans and feelings. You are the only person I completely opened myself up. Who knew not only my name but also the darkest secret I kept in my closet. Locked. Secured. Safely hidden. You are the very best friend I’ve ever had.

But where are you when I needed you the most? You disappeared like ashes in the water. Have I said or done something wrong that made you so upset with me like this? When things around me started to have vibrant colors, you suddenly fade into nothingness.

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I have so many things to share to you these past couple of weeks.  Something or shall I say, someone knocked on my door again. After two long, and lonesome years, that person came back. I don’t know if you can still remember him but I really wanted to consult this to you. You know that I really value your opinion more than anybody else. Being careful not to make the same mistakes all over again.

I am in the verge of confusion right now, and I know that noone can understand me the way you do. You completely knw me and my story. So, if you happen to read this, will you e-mail me back? Or will you just come back?

Here. Being my bestfriend.

Life and Everything Around It

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I can come up with a thousand of quotes about life. But in general, life is a journey to be traveled. And yes, one poet said- the grave is not its goal. Or else, the minute we think about living is the very minute we die.

Sometimes, I asked myself why? Why is there death? What id the purpose of living if we will die anyway? I realized now that to asked such question is to sin. Would we rather have not lived? We should be grateful to be here. To see all that is around us. tTo know life and its fragility and to value it for that reason. To live eaxh moment to the fullest, not to waste time and to waste a little bit of everything.

Life is precious. It is just one and there is no need for another if we lived well. Everyone must live his or her own life. Sure it is not always what we dream it to be, but we have to be patient and just count our blessings.

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We love and let go. We taste but not drain the cup. Fill our senses with everyrhing there is. We win, we loose. We fly, we fall. We forever change but life goes on. It’s not enough to have just survived, to have just lived and died. It’s the things we do with our lives, the people we care for and love. The events that becomee treasured memories, moments that are never forgotten. All those are ours and nobody else’s.

And life gives us the chance to have it, to know it and to have lived it.

A Little Treat To Myself

I can’t remember when was the last time I take a shower until my hands are like this…

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Creepy, isn’t it? But I just did right now. 

Thanks to Yogurt Spa Milk Salt and Lux Magical Spell Body Wash. They kept me in the shower for hours. 

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Leaving my skin soft and smooth. I have never felt so refreshed and inspired that I have decided to post yet another blog for this week!

Sometimes, little things in life pose a great impact to us. We might not notice them oftentimes because of our busy schedules but they are just there. Be it the golden glow of the September sun, a wisp of the Arabian air, or a simple smile from a friend.

So why not, stop for a while and ponder the small things in our life. And thank God that we are still able to breathe, to feel and to laugh.

For  all the blessings you have received, be thankful and don’t forget to be a blessing to someone else, as well.

 

A Piece about My Philosophy in Life

I believe that man must learn to live without those consolations called religious, which his own intelligence must by now have told him belong to the childhood of the race.

Philosophy can really give us nothing permanent to believe either. It is too reach in answers, each canceling out the rest.
The quest for meaning is fordoomed. Human life “means” nothing. But that is not to say that it is not worthliving.

What does a Debussy’s Arabesque or Mozart’s Nocturne ‘mean’, or a rainbow or a rose?

A man delights in all of these, knowing himself to be no more than a wisp of music and a hope of dreams dissolving against the sun.

Man has only his own two feet to stand on. His own human trinity to see him through: Reason, Courage and Grace. And the First plus the Second equals Third.

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Far Away From Home

Sometimes, things happen the least we expect them to occur. Worst, they even surprise you with a big bluff. There will be a lot of excitement, or a great loss due to a lack of anticipation. Whatever it could be, you could be caught offguard.

Sometimes, little things happen with no profound reason at all. Sometimes, they are so insignificant. Like pebbles that get stuck in your shoes. You kick them off and get rid of them. Then you continue walking, thinking you’ve wasted several seconds of your life with those bothersome things. It’s paltry but it happens once in a while unless you go barefoot.

Sometimes, you look up at the velvet sky and wish upon your shining star. Halfheartedly, you believe that your yearning would come true, no matter what they say that wishes are only for children. You may sometimes wonder why there will be wishes, if they will only cause pain and broken dreams. And so, you would only confine your aspirations to the seclusion of workable concept.

But have you ever sought where the edge of possibility is? It’s just over somewhere, where the impossibilities begin.

Why not let loose and amplify your diaphanous life? They say, the latest work of an artist is his masterpiece God has bestowed upon us. So, I’m now here. Amplifying my life. Living FAR AWAY FROM HOME. Despite the sadness, the loneliness, I know that at the edge of this, I’ll find my happiness. Eventually.

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